Time is flying

I realized today that I actually have very little "Kelly" time while I'm out recovering.  Before surgery, I imagined the recovery time to be long, slow days in which I could watch movies or read.  I pictured myself with my hot tea and settling down to ground myself again . . . to figure out how to still be me post-surgery . . . to deal with the emotional hurts as well as the physical . . . to pamper myself.

I am certainly getting pampered by Ken and the kids as well as family, friends, and colleagues. I'm not having to make dinner or clean.  Ken is even taking the brunt of the homework chore. 

Unfortunately, I'm not getting as much time to myself as I had imagined. Even though I'm not working much (I'm just keeping up on emails) and Ken is doing 95% of the work around the house, somehow I'm still caught up in the crazy schedule we keep.  Today I figured out that I only have 3 more days to watch all the movies, read all the books, and rediscover who I am.  Hmmmm, quite a tall order for 3 days.

Tomorrow is Tuesday and I'll have from 9-3 by myself.  Wednesday I have a doctor's appointment, so that day is shot (pun intended).  Then Thursday and Friday I'll have 9-3 again.  This weekend is a big swim meet and then it's holiday time.  Dec 21 through Jan 3 we'll be spending time with family either at our house or at theirs.  Now don't get me wrong, I love the holidays.  I love hosting and visiting our wonderful family.  I love all the old traditions and the ones we are making ourselves.  I'm fortunate enough to have an incredible family and close friends who have become like family too.

So I'm not whining about "obligations" because I really want to do all these family things.  I just wish I also had a few more weeks before or after the holidays when I could do all I fantasized about prior to surgery.  I guess that's what we all want, more time.  Well, at least as a result of this surgery, I have been given the gift of time.  Early detection and proactive surgery has made it much more likely that I will have more holidays with my children and hopefully with their children too.