So I did run the Chicago marathon but was very disappointed with my performance. My back cramped at 9.5 miles and left me struggling. At several points along the way, I was in tears believing that all that training was for nothing since I couldn't imaging finishing.
Finally, at about 13 miles, I changed the plan. Instead of running 3 minutes and walking 1 minute, I reversed the process. I knew I was going to cut it close for getting a qualified finishing time (under 6:30 was required for that race), but I really had no other choice.
I finished in 6:15:03. I placed 15,734 among women, 35,823 overall, and 1,451 in my age group. It sounds a little better to know that 1,651 people finished after me, I guess. And many more didn't finish. After this experience, I certainly can empathize with their pain and disappointment.
But the story of pain doesn't end as I crossed the finish line. Just steps past the finish line I heard the impossible news that I wouldn't get a medal. They ran out! At Chicago! I was amazed. I had fought through all that adversity and came in under the cut off time. I just couldn't believe there was no medal at the end. After the shock and disbelief, I took solace in the fact that I got my 26.2 car magnet at the expo though. Honestly, that was what really what I wanted for an award. Can you believe I went through all that for a car magnet? Twisted, certainly.
Just past the finish line, they had massage professionals, one of which rubbed my back for a few minutes and then it was fine. Damn! I wish I had stopped at a first aid tent at mile 11 to get that done! For the rest of the week, I was at a conference in Chicago and was pretty good physically. After my back cramp was released, I felt tired, but fine. Just emotionally drained, I guess.
When I got home from Chicago, I was greeted by my loving husband and kids. They made a paper medal for me (Ken got a pic of the actual medal off the web site). What a great idea! I wore it to work the next day.
A few days later, I received my finisher medal in the mail. It was engraved with my name and finishing time; their attempt to make up for the major disappointment and their mistake. I remember wishing they had left off the finishing time. I put the medal in a drawer.
For the next 4+ months, I quit running. I didn't get out on the road at all. I went to a few circuit training classes, did yoga once or twice a week, and played 90 minutes of competitive volleyball on Sunday nights, but I didn't do much else. I've gained weight and lost fitness.
It took me over 4 months to get over my disappointing my marathon experience. I still believe my race should have gone so much better, but I decided that I needed to quit being embarrassed about it and just move on. Thank goodness I finally got tired of my sulking.
In mid-February, I hung up the Chicago marathon poster in my office. And I'm just now writing this long overdue blog post. But most importantly, I've started to run again. My first day on the road was great and I was amazed how easy it was. I ran about 3.5 miles at about an 11:40 pace. I walked occasionally, probably about a minute every 3 minutes. I was thrilled with that run!
The next day I was sore, though. Very sore. I did yoga to try to loosen up and it helped somewhat. On Sunday I played volleyball, which was fine. Today I ran again. Although I ran 3 miles at about the same pace as a few days ago, it was much more difficult. I struggled. I finally had mercy on myself and walked the last half mile home.
Despite being sore and tight, I'm very glad to be back out there. Even when I was struggling today, it felt good to be on the road. I have no new goals yet. I'm just easing back into the process of running. And trying to eat better. Getting back on the horse.
If you see me on the road, give me a thumbs up. I am grateful for the encouragement and I'm motivated by all of you who are out there pounding the pavement.
